She wavered at the car and the crosswalk, not exactly weaving but not quite steady either. Her hair was six ways to Christmas, unbrushed; her skin was blotchy and eyes baggy without makeup. Her shorts were too short for a 50-something woman out in public, her T-shirt was stained and crumpled. It seemed she hadn’t … read more The woman with the dirty T-shirt
Tag: Tom
The trouble with food
My biggest struggle these days is something I used to love as a creative act: cooking. I make three meals a day, on as much of a schedule as we can manage in between medical appointments and trying to have a life, because it’s important in keeping Tom’s blood sugar regulated. But the restrictions mean … read more The trouble with food
Other people’s troubles
When I had to turn down a research gig, my contact at the client company wrote me a private note. She suggested that I get in touch with the Spousal Caregivers / Well Spouse Association. She knew about it because her husband has had MS for seven years. I was really shocked. She’s a young … read more Other people’s troubles
The Monkey’s Paw
Every time I’ve seen a wish granted that didn’t turn out so well, I mutter, “Monkey’s paw.” Be damn careful what you wish for. In fact, just stop wishing altogether. Maybe you read the short story by W. W. Jacobs, “The Monkey’s Paw,” in grade school, like I did. The story was written in 1902, … read more The Monkey’s Paw
Walking through mud
For several weeks, I’ve been having strange sensations. As though I am melting, like chocolate in the hot sun. As though I am walking through mud and can’t pick up my feet. As though I weigh 400 pounds, even as my actual weight continues to drop. When these were just occasional and physical, they didn’t … read more Walking through mud
The cooler people
Here’s a pro tip, one of many from my encounters with the health care system this year: When you have an appointment with a specialist, take a cooler. Not to offer the doctor a beer. Not to carry a spare heart for transplant. Though you might find both of those useful, too. No, bring a … read more The cooler people
Empty boxes
Tom quit smoking on my birthday. He didn’t actually start the day intending to do that. It just happened. When you are hospitalized with a stroke, they don’t let you light up in bed, oddly enough. So that took care of the first month of quitting. What surprised him was that he had no nicotine … read more Empty boxes
Law-abiding but oblivious
What’s wrong with this picture? Nothing, from a legal standpoint. There’s a handicapped parking space, and the non-handicapped driver has parked in the adjoining space. However, that adjoining space is where the cutaway sidewalk and ramp come up from the parking area. By parking there, this person has completely cut off access to the pool … read more Law-abiding but oblivious
Packing it IN
Tom, the stroke-bound slacker, sits in the recliner while I’m carrying 40-pound boxes from basement to main to loft and finding a place for the pots and pans in the pantry and texting the packout crew to ask where our pillows are. He wants me to stop and look at cat videos on Facebook. Spouses … read more Packing it IN
A change of plan
Chance of thunderstorms was around 50 percent, but we thought the skies had cleared. The last lightning strike had hit more than 45 minutes before. So we piled into the car to drive to the pool. We really wanted to go swimming. It’s still hot, another long day, and we wanted to exercise in the water. Skies were grey … read more A change of plan